shinyrock6498:

ask-oncies-jizz:

ask-oncies-jizz:

ask-oncies-jizz:

đź…±oly fuck gamers

okay here’s the thing about recruiting kecleon

it’s possible, but just barely. they have a -49.5% recruitment rate, by far the lowest in the entire game. you can boost your recruitment odds in a number of ways. being level 90-100 gives you +25%, and holding the golden mask gives you +24%.

but wait, that still adds up to -0.5% recruitment for kecleon, which is still literally impossible!! well, the Fast Friend iq skill gives you an extra +1% to your rate, giving you a whopping 0.5% chance to recruit kecleon every time you defeat one, given you meet all these requirements. it’s why i’m using celebi here.

more things you absolutely need to do if you want to recruit one:

  • evasion orbs. like, 10 of them. you need max evasion to stand a chance against the waves.
  • really, really ludicrously high stats. i’m playing sky, so i used the spinda bar to boost my stats
  • on top of having high base stats, you need a way to boost yourself. i brought a violent seed on top of that, and celebi has silver wind and ancient power that also have chances to give boosts to all stats. note: some kecleons have screech, if they manage to hit you with it you’re basically dead next time they hit you regardless of how bolstered your defenses are
  • max elixirs because you’re gonna run out of moves fending off the swarm

resetting will probably happen a lot but with preparation and patience you’ll get your kec eventually. there’s my handy hell lizard recruitment guide

image

the answer to that is a surprising “yes”, its IQ is reset to 0 (like all recruited pokemon) but its stats are ridiculous

image

the base stats in this game cap at 255 (because they’re counted by signed 8-bit binary) and it was one point off from hitting that cap when i recruited it. its hp is also ridiculously high at 282 despite only being level 42

so this makes it without any contest the single strongest pokemon you can have on your team in this game, stronger than mewtwo, stronger than dialga, everything. keep in mind you have to fight dozens of these at once to get one.

another thing:

most pokemon have a small pool of phrases determined by their IQ group, but kecleon seems to have unique dialogue when you talk to it in and out of dungeons. 

image

strange but cool detail to include for something that’s nearly impossible to get in the first place

I don’t know Pokemon but I do know insanity when I see it. True dedication here.

magefire:

hey reblog or reply w/ games that feel like home for you, games that immediately make u feel calm and peaceful the second you hear the intro music, and it’s like coming home or a breath of fresh air

anon–h:

kateitron:

jasperemerald23:

dantecain:

fenrisesque:

grandenchanterfiona:

brialavellan:

osunism:

smashcut:

askkakuro:

lesbianedgeworth:

mantismen:

sneezys-flower-mom:

abraca-mari:

mun-in-the-attic:

cartoonish-popplio:

lowly-wanderer:

paranormaldiblet:

cryptid-believer:

calibornsmainboo:

lacefuneral:

describe a video game in the absolute worse way possible: in the format of a “Florida Man” news headline

i.e. “Belgian Man Enraged by Smooth Jazz; Whacks People with Sticks, Consumes Raw Meat” (OFF)

abandoned child with a knife flirts with everyone

Teenage Girl Gets Embarrassingly Lost In Fog

circus child enters minds to save the world, occasionally sets fire to bears

Cephalopod children fight to the death with colorful ink.

Squid hybrids children do Paint Wars

Plummer fights against mutant turtle to save a badass woman

Kids catches magical creatures to fight against more people who will help them to become a champion

Local Swordsman Wastes Time Collecting Shit; Princess Still In Mortal Peril

People Explode Beans Just to Bury Rivals in Rocks

Local Farmer goes Mad: Starts Throwing Trash at Ponds, Claims to Hear Talking Fairy Sprites 

Local Rapper Starts Singing at Public Bathroom

Scientist says: Being not Perfect at Playing Music Causes Madness

Psychic Children Fend Off Alien Menace Using Bottle Rockets and Prayer

Plumber Teams Up with Rival, Girlfriend, “Frog”, and Possessed Doll; Defeats Intergalactic Blacksmith

michigan woman is just REALLY good at solving puzzles

Local Attorneys Take Courtroom Shenanigans Too Far; Body-Count Rising

Local man wakes up from 9 year coma to punch evil burn victim in the face. Also takes the theme of Moby Dick far too seriously

Mailman miraculously found alive in the desert, fucks local robot

Local dog uses magical graffiti to save the world.

Local woman leaves home to find her dad, ends up fighting the President.

Local Man Thinks His Dad’s Friends Are Assholes, Kills Them All.

“Kirkwall Woman Arrested For Everything”

“Local Woman Loves Cake, Solves 17 Puzzles To Get To It”

Local man ruins who fixed everything ruins everything, now with friends

Local woman straps guns to her feet and kills angelic beings, doesn’t even have gun permit

Local teams refuse to follow rules, damage property, and kill each other a lot

Local teens solve murder, summon Satan, and fight god.

Local child wakes up in the wrong body and world, has to fight a god to go back. Decides afterwards they don’t actually want to go back.